so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize
