I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
operation have a gay friend backfired
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
Randomize
