so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
If you wanna be a real wingman, create some insecurity and comment on that pic of all the hot girls with "Id do every girl in this pic.. except the fat one".
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
