id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
