I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
