What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize