Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize