I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
he shaved USA in his pubs
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize