1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
