can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Randomize
