why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
His daughter is our waitress. I left her a ten dollar 'I'm sorry I'm a whore and fucked your dad' tip...
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
in a meeting in my bathtub while predrinkin for tonight. technology.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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