So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I know her cup size but not her name....
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
