can we get nightvision for the apartment?
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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