So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize