I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
