You just made me feel so damn special
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
At one point my little brother was Rocky Balboa'd by a stripper's tit
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
