i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
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