I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
