Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I totally give up. Optimus Prime just fell from the top of the Great Pyramid into the hypostyle hall at Karnak.
mom just asked if we are going to need more kaluha as she pulls 5 out of the cupboard. this xmas might kill me
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
