today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Just bailed on her the best way possible. Got tickets to the game. Only issue is.... if we lose, we not only lost, but I skipped sex to watch us lose
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize