it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
I think I'm pregnant again.
or as we call it, thursday.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Randomize
