i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
