operation have a gay friend backfired
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
