You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
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