You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
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