he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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