I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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