real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
