Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
