im drinking this country out of the recession.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
