is your mom at the bar?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I woke up to him eating cereal out of my viking helmet with a shot glass. No idea where he got the milk.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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