I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
