Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
When did angry sex become our thing?
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
P.s. There are few things I love more than brand new mascara and you are one of them.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
