now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
