Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
There are dudes in kilts outside my window practicing fire breathing with cheap vodka and a modified grill lighter. I thought you should know.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
Randomize
