Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
Randomize
