I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
