Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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