Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
Randomize