It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
The only reason why I invited him to my party was because he is suicidal.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I just ate part of my sock, this has got to stop.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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