some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
