READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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