ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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