hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
Im eating ham and mustard naked, watching south park, but its totally cool cuz the paper plate is covering my nuts
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Come share oat with me in your robe
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
