Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
