Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
