The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Did I seriously answer the door for a home delivery of weed from you and your boss while wearing last night's 80s rockstar face paint?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Randomize