So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
