Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
If your gig isn't over in 30 minutes I am coming on that stage to come on your dick.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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