O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Randomize
