we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
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